I’m having a hard time even digesting the fact that my name is in an author spot on a book…that I wrote. I never ever wanted to write a book. If someone had told me I would do this even 10 years ago, I would have raised an eyebrow and laughed in disbelief. Actually, I was still reacting that way 2 years ago when people told me I should write a book. I was so overwhelmed with life already. I was hurting with a really angry neck, and I was not in the shape I am in now.
I remember the morning that I woke up and glanced up at my ceiling with my sleepy eyes and had the still small voice of God whisper,”Write your testimonies.” Hmmm…Um, but God…you have given me so many awesome testimonies. How can I write them all? “Amy, just start writing.”
The truth is, I still didn’t write them all. I can’t. I probably don’t even know them all. God is so good to protect, and guide. I did start writing though. I got out timelines I’d made of my injuries and dates, I got out paper and started writing the blessings during those times and you know what…I wrote like a crazy person for a month and a half. All day and sometimes randomly in the night, I wrote and I remembered. Many times I couldn’t see what I was typing through my tears. It hurt to relive some things, it catapulted me back to those moments, but coupled with the blessings I knew would follow, it was actually a beautiful thing to see this story unfold. A story of God’s presence and care during some of the most difficult moments of my life.
One morning toward the end of those months, I woke up to a loud storm with big thunder, pouring rain and frequent lightening. I am totally weird and I love storms and their excitement and power. It was 2am and no matter what, I couldn’t go back to sleep. I rolled my achy bones out of bed and I went in the living room to my chair and I opened the computer. I had to write. The thoughts suddenly forming like rolling thunderheads, and then unleashing in torrents of important thoughts and blessings. I wrote through the early morning hours, throughout the day and into the evening and then the thoughts slowed and calmed as sleepiness set in. I felt peace. I thought I was done. God must always get a good chuckle at my ignorance. I didn’t know that more of the story was yet to come.
One of my best friends was editing for me and we were to chapter 2. She was my writing cheerleader. Marlene had a way with written words. I respected her ability to write in a lovely way. I remember the day she was half way through the 2nd chapter and we were talking on the phone and she told me that she had forgotten how much happened. The best part, was that she liked it. She laughed and said she thought it was really funny and she told me she was really enjoying reading it. We never got further than that. She was taken home to God much sooner than I expected. Then I left the book alone. It sat untouched.
About 6 months later, I woke up and knew that it was time to write more. So much had happened in those months. I needed to include it. It’s clear to me now why it needed to be that way. Now I knew where and how to end the book. Certainly the story isn’t over, but God was trying to help me portray a message. A huge message. You’ll have to read it if you want to get that message. Haha I know…cliff hanger. I’m sorry about that.
I will tell you that I have felt a healing in my soul in writing this book. I was shown a picture. When I was deep in the trials, I couldn’t back up far enough away from the struggle to really see this bigger picture. Now that I relived it while writing it, I was able to see the blessings laid out in just a fraction of their intricate perfection. It still moves me to tears. I can honestly say that I would choose all of this struggle as a whole again even if someone told me that I could have a completely healthy body as a trade. I would choose it because I have a different confidence in God. I have a closer relationship with God than I had before it, and I have made some of the most incredibly beautiful connections with the souls around me during all of this. I only wish that I could tell Marlene. I confess, I asked God to tell her that I got the book out, and that I love her so much and I miss her and I can’t believe it’s been a year since we talked. I told Him to tell my grandma too. I have a big line of people in heaven I can’t wait to see. I can only imagine…how glorious a day that will be. While we are here on earth though, we have a mission. Life is a gift. Use it for God.
If you would like to buy my book, you can find an Amazon link on my blog page. It should be released and ready for sale with Barnes and Nobel in the next 48 hours. It’s also available in e book on Kobo and i tunes. You can also follow this link to my publishers page. If you scroll down you can watch a trailer for the book and underneath that you can click on the icon of the store you would like to purchase it from. http://www.christianfaithpublishing.com/books/?book=the-magnificent-story-of-a-lame-author